I'm in the study having a lie down whilst listening to Alanis Morissette.
I've earned this relaxation by being tested to the limit today. Honestly, if you all knew even half of what I put up with in a 'normal' day...
When I first moved to London (I'm from the Midlands but my accent is almost gone now) I used to go nearly crazy trying to keep order everywhere I went because order is what collies do. For more information on what collies do see this:
Alright, so it was collies and some mad people but could it have happened without the collies, eh? No.
Point is that I used to round up joggers, cyclists and people who weren't going in the same direction as me when I first came to London and FP discovered that I had some issues with living amongst lots of people as opposed to lots of fields like when we were in the Midlands.
We worked on my issues and now, as you all know, I just bark at things I cannot control. In my heart I am herding all these variables into a circle. In reality I'm just making sh**-loads of noise.
Then, this evening, I was out in the garden waiting for FP to come home and blow me but didn't a fox amble by looking all like "I own all this"!? Cheek! I was so surprised I forgot to bark loudly and made this pathetic little 'Wuff' sound. Not enough to put the fear into Mr Fox as I would have wished but enough to alert him to my Presence, at which point he dashed away. Casual as you like he was up to that point then gone in a second, off into someone's back garden for a night of making that dreadful racket with his friends.
Or, and this is the horrible part, maybe FP was with the fox all day and the reason he showed up when she did is because she prefers hanging out with foxes and not me!
You see now why I need Alanis, don't you?
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