Unhandled Error

I was saddened to read that our friend Tom had been subject to some saliva which caused beeping. The setter in question was probably swept away by how much fun Tom was being as he ran on*. An ineffectual owner is a curse in situations like this.

Anyway it set me thinking in my special collie way of how humans could all do a bit more thinking sometimes...

*Setters take an awful lot of outrunning, Tom, thumbs up!

Three Irishmen in a vet's waiting room...

...only outnumbered by the idiots cat owners provocatively placing their sickie moggies in front of the stressed out dogs.  

For cat baskets read LUNCH BOXES & why is that not obvious to the cat owning amongst you?

I mean, pardon me for being a dog and all that, but seriously cat owners you are not the only ones in the world and if I'm at the vet's it is NOT because I want to be! It's because I'm sick or injured and being there is STRESSFUL so when you place a cat in a box right there in front of me and it sees me and starts making that unearthly yowling noise, what do you think is going to happen? I'd like to point out that you could have avoided ever having to have gone to the effort of raising your eyebrows and dishing out the hard stares by BOTHERING TO LOOK AROUND YOU AND SEEING THAT THERE ARE OTHER PEOPLE AND ANIMALS IN THE WORLD, IT'S NOT JUST YOU AND YOUR VICIOUS, SPITTING CAT EVEN THOUGH YOU'D LOVE IT THAT WAY!

In other news, I enjoyed my walk in the park this morning.

Ouch

That's really all I have to say...

Feeling a bit down?

I gather that times are hard. FP & I sat listening to the radio yesterday as others variously ranted, raved, coaxed & cajoled depending on their 'politics'.

Now, I don't know for sure that 'politics' aren't a bit like fleas (certainly I have seen humans scratching their heads whilst discussing them, which is indicative) but I do know when it's time to offer some good old-fashioned collie advice:

Roll in fox doot. Yes.

Rolling in fox doot lifts the spirit and the effects are long lasting. Let me give you an example, after a really decent roll not so long back I was doing some running. I picked up so much speed at one point that a big gust of fox doot smell washed over me when I slowed and the air about me caught up. It was fantastic *looks off into middle distance, remembering...*

Running up that hill

It's a big steep hill in a wood and I love it *punches air* Get in!

Tell Malcolm I found his key

I had to go to the police station this morning to drop off a key I found whilst out on my walk. By the grace of my immense Collie Power, I was able to learn that it was Malcolm's key (actually I heard FP reading the message on the keyring to ST).

Exciting stuff, huh? I'll bet even Resolver Hound never went to a police station!

Mmmm

Hello (FP's) sandwich. My name is NunuThunder.

Yes Tugger!

Picture the scene: car pulls in, door opens, and I'm launched!

Launched, I tell you! 

I can run, jump, grab Tugger from the air, then look for all the world as if I'm going to bring it back to FP & ST before dropping it half way and running off to supervise other random dogs in the vicinity.

Normal service is resumed!

No Tugger

Yes, no Tugger in the park today as FP & I were unaccompanied by the mightiest 'Tugger Tosser' in the land - ST! 

You can tell why I wanted to qualify the term tosser by keeping Tugger in there, can't you? And this reminds me of something I was reading today about free listing as a research method to help with information retrieval. If I ever catch up with Resolver Hound, I'm planning to question him on the size of his vocabulary because he seems very capable at finding his way around.

You might recall my past post about a collie who had around 340 words and got on TV because it could fetch its toy from the next room. Well, I dare say most collies out there when invited to bring their toy from the next room would probably end up bringing the one they have most fun with (often it's the one which exercises their humans the most!), so I don't think that collie is SOOOO special on this evidence. 

I would however be impressed if that collie had made a list of toys. And more impressed still if it had displayed its preferences for the toys by placing them in a hierarchy - most fun at the top, tooth-snagging rags at the bottom. If it happened that a reasonable number of collies had done this listing, we could then compare lists and derive from the results the ultimate toy for collies*. Then, if collies were also librarians**, they could use this technique to make sure that all the collie catalog users had appropriate keywords to search with so that they could locate the toys on the shelves***. BTW, this catalog would have nothing to do with cats & would be called something along the lines of 'Golden Information Retriever'.

*You couldn't do this with spaniels. I've seen spaniels who were just happy to splash in puddles.

**It could happen.

***Shelves are no obstacle to collies.

The Road to Fitness

Owing to the horrendous cut on my paw I have been confined to base camp, walked on the lead, and prevented from playing energetically with ANY of my toys - until now!

Yays, I'm on the road to full fitness and may even be able to persuade FP to bring Tugger to the park with us tomorrow. The wet weather has not helped me at all; I needed to keep my paw dry in order for the cut to heal.

Bandages on a dog's legs are not easy, covering them with a plastic bag increases the potential to slip and my sockie-boot things tend to twist around and there's a split where the wet can get in and (AND) the leather parts wear out quickly and (AND AND!) they really smell once they get wet!

What I need is for someone to design a protective sockie-boot thing that goes like a harness over my back. A bit like waders with braces. The material needs to be hard-wearing and waterproof. The sockie-boot is okay for dry conditions and light usage mostly on grass but not great in the rain and on paths. I might try and draw a picture of what I mean later...

Healing Hands

I think FP's magic bandaging technique has made a difference! My cut paw is much better and I'm doing my best to help by sleeping on my back most of the day. If you happen upon me whilst I am sleeping on my back, feel free to rub my belly *intense stare*.
In other news I am starting to take an interest in French rugby - no less incomprehensible than the English game at this stage but also less rain. I might suggest that they play the golf there next time!